January 25th

Tehrir

I still don’t feel like I’m in place that I can blog about these past 21 days; my heart is still lodged firmly in my throat.

My friends, my family, acquaintences, people I didn’t know but who I followed on twitter and felt close to in an internet-ty sort of way, were putting their lives, their safety on the line for the good of a nation… their nation.

Other friends and family were taken in by the constant barrage of propaganda on State TV and who spoke against this fight for their freedom; a fight they didn’t understand and couldn’t see in its entirety. I felt constricted by their inability to see, it was like bashing your head against an immovable wall.

I spent those 18 days glued to computers and Al-Jazeera (who did such an outstanding job at reporting from Egypt that I STILL don’t know how they did it.) I barely slept. I barely ate. I cried. I agonized. When I did sleep, I dreamt about the revolution.

I wanted so badly to be in Tehrir. I like to say that I would give anything to have been there, but the truth is that what I would have given up is my job. I’ll carry a little bit of shame inside me forever, no matter how rational and responsible my reasons for staying were.

The fact of the matter is that once the anti-foreigner sentiment took hold I would have been relegated to the side anyway, simply for protection of the Egyptians fighting.

But, whether I physically threw rocks and bandaged wounds or not, the simple fact is that I am a different person post revolution. It may have only been 21 days ago, but to me, and to Egypt, it was a lifetime ago.

I am so proud of my friends and family, of my acquaintances, of those tweeps who I may not know in person…

I am proud of Egypt.

Proud of those people.

And the moment my husband finishes his schooling, I will begin packing our bags to go back to help rebuild this country.

I may not have been able to give my blood, sweat, and tears to freeing the country, but I will dedicate them to building it back up.

Ta7ya Masr.

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5 responses to “January 25th

  1. Salam, Hey Molly! Long time no read 🙂 I love this post mashaa Allaah. It’s refreshing to know you’re planning to come back, I’m sure you’ll be pleasantly surprised by all the changes in the people 😀 May Allaah keep this spirit alive in them, and all of us, ameen.

  2. That’s awesome! I wanted nothing more than to be there either… Although I know it would have been rough for me and I would not have been useful… I was so proud though, Egyptians really showed how awesome they are. I hope to go to Egypt to live for some time in the future – don’t know when that might be! Good luck with everything!!

  3. salam sister, i was googling muslimah blogs and came across yours. I, too, am american muslimah married to an egyptian man and ready to move across the world. i read some of your views and you remind me a bit of myself that no one else understands and i really couldnt give a crap LMAO… unfortunately my husband is content here in NY/NJ area and wants to just visit egypt until we retire in many many many years from now, then we would settle there in alexandria insha’ALLAH when our daughters are already married and taken care of.. OK anyway im going off topic lol i just want to say i relate to you in so many ways and am looking forward to reading more about your days in egypt. i left you my facebook website above.. was wondering if you had a “like” page for your blog on facebook?Thank you God bless xoxo
    oh and incase you dont feel comfortable because you dont know me, im not a weirdo LMAOOO who says that? haha.. i am a friend of mama kalila who has commented above me here on this blog lol have a good day.. ❤

  4. What a fantastic, uplifting post. Brava!

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