Love/Hate

As much as I despise living here and no matter how badly I want to go home I know that I am going to crave, like a struggling drug addict, the always changing randomness that is Egypt.

Sitting here at work looking over a CV from someone who is obviously not proficient at English, who has sent me a photocopied PDF file of a typed CV including all manner of stamped official papers in Arabic, and hearing both the garbled yelling/salutations of the doormen downstairs and the tinny echo of Oum Kalthoum playing somewhere else in the building I am struck by the bitter yet sweet sense of mingled disgust and love.

Like a drug I hate it as much as I need it.

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9 responses to “Love/Hate

  1. At times like these, go back and read those old posts on your old blog about how much you can’t wait to go to Egypt. PS. did you get my sms?

  2. yes sorry, been super busy. I now know what half-board is. Thanks babe.

  3. Wow, I’m going to have to dig into your site too…thanks for stopping by, glad to have found you. I like your writing style…really…

  4. that’s ok, we all feel that way. but i am told – and am starting to experience – that after a while u just go “fuck this shizz!” and go, only to return on vacations. and that’s if you’re egyptian. i’m at the point now where street yelling and om kalthoum make me want to punch people in the face. SOME PEACE AND QUIET DAMMIT I LIVE IN ZAMALEK!

  5. Oh God, if the majesty of Oum Kalthoum is getting you down its time to leave.

    If only I had a set date on which I am out of here I would start X’ing the calendar now.

  6. i just have a hate/hate relationship with egypt. i’ve been here for a while and hate it even more. i had hopes of leaving soon but i am still here so i mine as well accept it, right? NEVER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    • Ilka, wow to have been here 6 years and hate it so much. Is there any chance of you and your husband moving home?

      I’ll be surprised if I make the 1 yr mark with living here, I’m so antsy to go home.

  7. who knows. we had planned to go back after he finished his bachelors but then he wanted to do his MBA here and then he got a good job, etc, etc. i still have hope though.

  8. Salaamu alaikum, hababti.
    I’m so sorry to hear how things are going pretty hard for you over there. Since I’ve been on a blog hiatus, I haven’t caught up with your whole story (inshaAllah I’ll read your posts when I can) – so I’m left wondering, why exactly you really, really don’t like living there.
    See, I’m bracing myself, ’cause my hubby is pretty determined to live there. Because I hear sentiments in support and on the offense of it, I’m totally on the fence. I’m so curious to know the real deal, because as we all know, visiting just ain’t it. Dh could possibly be persuaded not to, if I felt strongly enough about it….but in our case, it would all be for the kids, seeing as living in America as an adult is easy. It might be much more confusing and conflicting in the young, developing mind of someone who’s aqeedah is not yet firm, and who is torn between two cultures (islam, and mainstream USA). What’s your take on this?
    I pray Allah eases your difficulties and puts peace in your heart. I pray you and your mom have a healthy, happy time together! Ameen.

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